Post by leethality101 on Oct 1, 2023 23:46:22 GMT -5
With a flicker and the unmistakable sound of a video tape being placed into a VCR; not that kids in today's world know what that is; the camera came to life to show that of a simple bar stool that had presumably commandeered from one of the many bar stools that littered the compound set before some background promoting the Last Man Standing competition itself. Loud and belligerent as ever, the familiar drawl of the This Is Awesome Women's Champion could be heard off screen; along with another exhausted voice.
"What do ya want me to do?"
"For the fourth time; I was told to get you to sit in front of a camera and get your take on what happened in the first event."
"So like one of them silly confession clips that're always littered in those reality competition shows? That sounds sills, but okay dokey!"
Stepping into frame with a plastic cup filled with.....something(?), the young woman plopped down onto the bar stool with a huff. Clearly she couldn't be bothered with such a thing, but here she was regardless; drink in hand! Taking a moment to drink from her cup, Jessie soon fixed the camera with a goofy smile.
"'EEEEEEEEEEEY YO!"
Oh god she was loud.
"It's your favorite Aussie bish here an' Stan Lubnuts wa-"
"IT'S! JOHN! ROBERTS!"
"Yeah, yeah; what the fuck ever."
As an audible groan in frustration was heard off screen, the pugilist powerhouse took another swig from her cup be continuing.
"Anyways; I was told that this was kind of a mandatory thing an' I had to take 'bout happened. To kinda recap things, ya know? Well, after a couple rounds I'm sittin' here wonderin' if THAT'S what people wanna listen to me talk about. I mean, my team lost an' the other won; what's there to talk about?"
Looking down into her drink, she swirled the remaining contents absentmindedly.
"Brooke Blakely and how she changed teams?"
Looking up quickly, she fixed Mister Roberts (presumably) with a confused look.
"The fuck is that an' who gave 'em such terrible namin' advice? Shit doesn't even really roll off the tongue right, right?"
"She's the one tha-"
Suddenly a flash of recognition flew across her face and she cut him off with a laugh that nearly caused her to spill off her seat.
"She's that right plastic cunt that throw a bitch fit for whatever reason, right? Yeah, what a dumb ankle biter for sure! Totally under the ]DO NOT TRUST category now!"
"Well, that's just it. There is also the question on whether or not you would like to switch teams as well. Remember? We discussed this."
"Did we? Mate, ya gotta keep in mind that was like five rounds ago!"
As another audible groan was heard off camera, the TIA Women's strap holder took a third swig from her cup. Shouldn't it nearly be empty not? She wasn't exactly sipping on the dang thing!
""Ight, so since I already discussed this with Mister Googly Teats."
"What does that even mean?"
"I was given the question on whether or not if I wanted to jump ship an' join those goobers over on the blue team. Gotta say, after all the shenanigans from the last challenge, it's a mighty temptin' offer. Realistically speakin', I ain't sure if I like any of the lackadaisical cunts on my team. One couldn't have been bothered to even try for fuck's sake!"
"That said...."
"I can't really say I know most of 'em aside from Frost an' Hilton and that's only cause I outlasted both of 'em to become the This Is Awesome Women's champ. Though, I gotta say that O'Donnell an' Weathers seem like okay people ;might end up eating those words later, but we'll see. Other then that I can't really say I got much love for the people 'round me on the team. Expectations of gettin' into a fight with the Meltin' Pauper or The Woman of a Billion Nicknames, maybe, but that's really 'bout it."
"The Blue Team on the other hand....."
"Really ain't much better. I mean, I already know I vibe fairly well with Zara since we're Chaos Queens an' I fairly certain I'd get along with people like Buchanon an' Plimmswoody, but there ain't any guarantee that'd be a good thing. Plus, other than Ivory, the only one I know even an inklin' 'bout is Page an' I'm fairly certain she has that ol' grizzled veteran mindset that Frost has where ya don't fuckin' matter 'less ya win the World strap six months in after ya sign with a company. So, like, meh?"
With a half-hearted partial shrug, the Aussie Assault brought the cup to her lips once more; presumably to finish the cup's contents.
"That's it? That's hardly an answer."
Pausing before the liquid could be spilled into her obnoxious mouth, a long silence befell Jessie as she gave John-boy an odd look; a mixture of anger of being interrupted mid drink and that of a disgruntled look that screamed "REALLY?". As the silence stretched along for a few more agonizing moments, She slowly lowered the cup and fixed the camera with the very same look that she had give Mister John Roberts.
"The fuck ya want from me? Some prolonged torchin' of everyone on my team; one that'd completely ruin whatever careers they've managed to scrounge together prior to gettin' roped into this competition? Granny Frost an' Hipster Hilton are still salty as fuck from when I did then dirty like that for the strap an' I'm sure their asses are still red from the beatin' they got cause of it. Not sayin' that it wouldn't be fun to sit 'ere an' run 'em down with a barrage of verbal diarrhea that'd go viral with the caption "TIA Women's Champion goes off in drunken rampage!", but right now the fact is this little game is still in the fledgling stage where ya still have to work in these loosely fabricated teams."
"Although...."
Licking her upper lip as she drifted off, the HorrorKore Hottie absently swirled her drink as she seemingly fell into deep thought. At least, that's what appeared to be the case. A moment later she abruptly brought the cup to her mouth and chugged the remaining portion; leaning back on the stool as she did so! Once she was done Jessie wiped the corner of her mouth with the back of her hand and toss the cup to the annoying bastard behind the camera that had been doing his best to keep the erratic woman on track; poor bloke didn't get paid enough. Give John Roberts a raise Sauce Boss!
"That mid shit ain't the name of the game is it?"
"Last Team Standin'/"
"Hell nah!"
"It's Last Man Standin' an' it for a bloody fuckin' reason! Bein' all goody-goody an' buddy-buddy is all well an' good, but we're all here for one thing an' one thing only; WIN! If people wanna get a bug up there ass 'bout something pointless like switchin' teams then I say let 'em! Clearly they weren't cut out for this competition an' the sooner they slid to the bottom of the shit pile the better! 'Cause this woman right here, the This Is Awesome Women's Champion, ain't here to sit around an' fuck spiders. She's fuckin' here to show that didn't win the strap on a fluke. She's here to have some fun an' kick some ass! Fuck, she's here to WIN!"
"So this little notion of changin' teams?"
"Blow it outta your asses cause it doesn't matter what team this foul mouthed bish on; she's in it to win it! Put me on the Blue Team or keep me on the Red Team, itjust doesn't matter to me! Ya wanna be friends just so we have to stab each other in the back sooner than later to win? Fuckin' neat. Wanna be enemies for no other reason than I boundless charisma while ya have less than a snail? Sure; why the fuck not! Whichever team I'm on should consider itself lucky before things devolve into single competition pandemonium!"
"Why?"
"Other the the fact that I'm the ONLY This Is Awesome champion (out of two) here?"
With fiery determination burning in her eyes, she hopped down from the stool and she it back into the background; aggression oozing in every motion.
"'Cause I'm the ONLY bish here that ACTUALLY has the heart to compete! Sure ya got the feisty cunts with the nifty little shine of them bein' long-standin' here in the wrestling community an' ya got those goobers that'll fade back into obscurity that wanna bust outta that shell, but when it comes down to makin' a big ol' mark on the industry; makin' the impossible possible when other's count her down an' out? You're starin' at the one that does it better than ANYONE else today!"
"STRAIGHT."
"FUCKING."
"FACTS."
Falling silent after the final emphatic word, Jessie merely continued to stare into the camera; daring someone to pop out to tell her otherwise.
"Great response. Ever think about becoming a politicization? That non answer was superb."
Looking past the camera, she fixed Mister Roberts with a sharp look.
"Shut the fuck up before I remind the world of my LEETHALITY."
Whether it be because he lacked a response to his tormentor or simply due to fear, Mister Roberts held his tongue. Jessie, on the other hand, snapped her attention back to the camera and smiled like child thought of something fun; all traces of the passionate aggression gone.
"So while ya stick that in your pipes an' smoke it........I'm gonna go get myself a drink! Catch ya later, ya greasy neckbearded fucks!"
"Big Titty Goth Dommy Mommy out!"
Almost skipping, Jessie exited the confessional with a laugh as the camera faded to black moments later; catching one final exchange between the two.
"Would this be your eighth round? Haven't you had enough?"
"Don't ~C~AAAAAAAAA~R~E~!"
"What do ya want me to do?"
"For the fourth time; I was told to get you to sit in front of a camera and get your take on what happened in the first event."
"So like one of them silly confession clips that're always littered in those reality competition shows? That sounds sills, but okay dokey!"
Stepping into frame with a plastic cup filled with.....something(?), the young woman plopped down onto the bar stool with a huff. Clearly she couldn't be bothered with such a thing, but here she was regardless; drink in hand! Taking a moment to drink from her cup, Jessie soon fixed the camera with a goofy smile.
"'EEEEEEEEEEEY YO!"
Oh god she was loud.
"It's your favorite Aussie bish here an' Stan Lubnuts wa-"
"IT'S! JOHN! ROBERTS!"
"Yeah, yeah; what the fuck ever."
As an audible groan in frustration was heard off screen, the pugilist powerhouse took another swig from her cup be continuing.
"Anyways; I was told that this was kind of a mandatory thing an' I had to take 'bout happened. To kinda recap things, ya know? Well, after a couple rounds I'm sittin' here wonderin' if THAT'S what people wanna listen to me talk about. I mean, my team lost an' the other won; what's there to talk about?"
Looking down into her drink, she swirled the remaining contents absentmindedly.
"Brooke Blakely and how she changed teams?"
Looking up quickly, she fixed Mister Roberts (presumably) with a confused look.
"The fuck is that an' who gave 'em such terrible namin' advice? Shit doesn't even really roll off the tongue right, right?"
"She's the one tha-"
Suddenly a flash of recognition flew across her face and she cut him off with a laugh that nearly caused her to spill off her seat.
"She's that right plastic cunt that throw a bitch fit for whatever reason, right? Yeah, what a dumb ankle biter for sure! Totally under the ]DO NOT TRUST category now!"
"Well, that's just it. There is also the question on whether or not you would like to switch teams as well. Remember? We discussed this."
"Did we? Mate, ya gotta keep in mind that was like five rounds ago!"
As another audible groan was heard off camera, the TIA Women's strap holder took a third swig from her cup. Shouldn't it nearly be empty not? She wasn't exactly sipping on the dang thing!
""Ight, so since I already discussed this with Mister Googly Teats."
"What does that even mean?"
"I was given the question on whether or not if I wanted to jump ship an' join those goobers over on the blue team. Gotta say, after all the shenanigans from the last challenge, it's a mighty temptin' offer. Realistically speakin', I ain't sure if I like any of the lackadaisical cunts on my team. One couldn't have been bothered to even try for fuck's sake!"
"That said...."
"I can't really say I know most of 'em aside from Frost an' Hilton and that's only cause I outlasted both of 'em to become the This Is Awesome Women's champ. Though, I gotta say that O'Donnell an' Weathers seem like okay people ;might end up eating those words later, but we'll see. Other then that I can't really say I got much love for the people 'round me on the team. Expectations of gettin' into a fight with the Meltin' Pauper or The Woman of a Billion Nicknames, maybe, but that's really 'bout it."
"The Blue Team on the other hand....."
"Really ain't much better. I mean, I already know I vibe fairly well with Zara since we're Chaos Queens an' I fairly certain I'd get along with people like Buchanon an' Plimmswoody, but there ain't any guarantee that'd be a good thing. Plus, other than Ivory, the only one I know even an inklin' 'bout is Page an' I'm fairly certain she has that ol' grizzled veteran mindset that Frost has where ya don't fuckin' matter 'less ya win the World strap six months in after ya sign with a company. So, like, meh?"
With a half-hearted partial shrug, the Aussie Assault brought the cup to her lips once more; presumably to finish the cup's contents.
"That's it? That's hardly an answer."
Pausing before the liquid could be spilled into her obnoxious mouth, a long silence befell Jessie as she gave John-boy an odd look; a mixture of anger of being interrupted mid drink and that of a disgruntled look that screamed "REALLY?". As the silence stretched along for a few more agonizing moments, She slowly lowered the cup and fixed the camera with the very same look that she had give Mister John Roberts.
"The fuck ya want from me? Some prolonged torchin' of everyone on my team; one that'd completely ruin whatever careers they've managed to scrounge together prior to gettin' roped into this competition? Granny Frost an' Hipster Hilton are still salty as fuck from when I did then dirty like that for the strap an' I'm sure their asses are still red from the beatin' they got cause of it. Not sayin' that it wouldn't be fun to sit 'ere an' run 'em down with a barrage of verbal diarrhea that'd go viral with the caption "TIA Women's Champion goes off in drunken rampage!", but right now the fact is this little game is still in the fledgling stage where ya still have to work in these loosely fabricated teams."
"Although...."
Licking her upper lip as she drifted off, the HorrorKore Hottie absently swirled her drink as she seemingly fell into deep thought. At least, that's what appeared to be the case. A moment later she abruptly brought the cup to her mouth and chugged the remaining portion; leaning back on the stool as she did so! Once she was done Jessie wiped the corner of her mouth with the back of her hand and toss the cup to the annoying bastard behind the camera that had been doing his best to keep the erratic woman on track; poor bloke didn't get paid enough. Give John Roberts a raise Sauce Boss!
"That mid shit ain't the name of the game is it?"
"Last Team Standin'/"
"Hell nah!"
"It's Last Man Standin' an' it for a bloody fuckin' reason! Bein' all goody-goody an' buddy-buddy is all well an' good, but we're all here for one thing an' one thing only; WIN! If people wanna get a bug up there ass 'bout something pointless like switchin' teams then I say let 'em! Clearly they weren't cut out for this competition an' the sooner they slid to the bottom of the shit pile the better! 'Cause this woman right here, the This Is Awesome Women's Champion, ain't here to sit around an' fuck spiders. She's fuckin' here to show that didn't win the strap on a fluke. She's here to have some fun an' kick some ass! Fuck, she's here to WIN!"
"So this little notion of changin' teams?"
"Blow it outta your asses cause it doesn't matter what team this foul mouthed bish on; she's in it to win it! Put me on the Blue Team or keep me on the Red Team, itjust doesn't matter to me! Ya wanna be friends just so we have to stab each other in the back sooner than later to win? Fuckin' neat. Wanna be enemies for no other reason than I boundless charisma while ya have less than a snail? Sure; why the fuck not! Whichever team I'm on should consider itself lucky before things devolve into single competition pandemonium!"
"Why?"
"Other the the fact that I'm the ONLY This Is Awesome champion (out of two) here?"
With fiery determination burning in her eyes, she hopped down from the stool and she it back into the background; aggression oozing in every motion.
"'Cause I'm the ONLY bish here that ACTUALLY has the heart to compete! Sure ya got the feisty cunts with the nifty little shine of them bein' long-standin' here in the wrestling community an' ya got those goobers that'll fade back into obscurity that wanna bust outta that shell, but when it comes down to makin' a big ol' mark on the industry; makin' the impossible possible when other's count her down an' out? You're starin' at the one that does it better than ANYONE else today!"
"STRAIGHT."
"FUCKING."
"FACTS."
Falling silent after the final emphatic word, Jessie merely continued to stare into the camera; daring someone to pop out to tell her otherwise.
"Great response. Ever think about becoming a politicization? That non answer was superb."
Looking past the camera, she fixed Mister Roberts with a sharp look.
"Shut the fuck up before I remind the world of my LEETHALITY."
Whether it be because he lacked a response to his tormentor or simply due to fear, Mister Roberts held his tongue. Jessie, on the other hand, snapped her attention back to the camera and smiled like child thought of something fun; all traces of the passionate aggression gone.
"So while ya stick that in your pipes an' smoke it........I'm gonna go get myself a drink! Catch ya later, ya greasy neckbearded fucks!"
"Big Titty Goth Dommy Mommy out!"
Almost skipping, Jessie exited the confessional with a laugh as the camera faded to black moments later; catching one final exchange between the two.
"Would this be your eighth round? Haven't you had enough?"
"Don't ~C~AAAAAAAAA~R~E~!"