Post by Fred Debonair on Oct 22, 2022 4:46:15 GMT -5
I look around from the bar stool I’m sitting on, empty save for a line of judges I can barely see due to spotlights on my face and a Janitor in the wings. I lean my head toward the microphone I’m holding, instead of bringing it up to my mouth…
“Who do I want to fight? I think the better question is, who don’t I want to fight? There’s a long line of names just ready to be reeled off like a graduation list. But, you know how some people may say Hitler, R. Kelly or Little Finger from Game of Thrones? Well, those aren’t the people I would choose. No, the person I would choose to fight, given the chance, is this guy…”
I signal for the Janitor to come onto the stage. He does so, pushing something that is covered with cloth. He slowly pulls off the cloth and retreats back into the wings, as his uncovering reveals a mirror… A mirror that is focused on me and me alone, we (my reflection and I) point at one another…
“Frederick Stephen Debonair. This is a forty year old man, formally happily married with two psychotic children currently sectioned at a Psych Unit in Los Angeles… Why do I want to fight him? Why do I want to choke this man out, leaving him laying on his own living room floor fighting for air? Well you see that part is quite difficult to explain but it’ll probably help if I start at the beginning. You see some of the choices this man has made in his lifetime are questionable and some are extremely questionable, I don’t think there’s ever one choice made by the guy that’s been the right one.
Take for example when he was fourteen, Fred Debonair had been at a party which to begin with he shouldn’t have been at, his mother had warned him and had only relented on him going out because he assured her he was staying over at a friend's house… That night, Fred took Xanax and Oxy and wound up in the local hospital almost dying and had to have his stomach pumped. This idiot already almost wrecked his entire life for the sake of “doing something cool” with his friends…
Not even two years later this dumb son of a bitch tried to convince me and his own brother it would be a very good idea to start insulting and piss off, some very hardened individuals on motorcycles outside of a club, in Reno… That very same night, Pacey Debonair, brother of Fred was killed by a very deranged individual who belonged to this same group of bikers… Yes you heard me correctly, Fred’s actions had cost his brother his life!”
I shuffle slightly uncomfortably on the bar stool as I close my eyes, memories flooding back.
“You see, everybody thinks this guy is some lovable rogue! A misunderstood individual but no, no he isn’t. Fred Debonair grew up with one thing on his mind, himself and everything he ever did was for his own benefit and gain… At the top of this whole thing I said that he had never made a decision that turned out to be correct for him, I was lying. At sixteen, just after the death of his brother he took to Wrestling… But even then, everything was about him.
He had been pulled into a match, after being in a promotion and training for less than a month because one of the original participants didn’t show. His opponent was a little wary of this young, inexperienced “Wrestler” going head to head with him but the promoter just saw dollar signs and so the match was booked. Now Fred could have looked at this as an opportunity to speak his mind and tell the promoter he wasn’t ready, but he didn’t. He wanted to make a name for himself and in doing so he delivered moved to his opponent so inaccurately several times, the man ended up in a coma…”
I turn my attention to my reflection, I point again… Pent up anger is flowing upwards inside my gut.
“It’s always you, you, you, isn't it Fred?! You never engage that damn brain of yours and I know what you’re going to say man… Better to ask forgiveness than permission right?? But it doesn’t always work that way and you know why. As well as Pacey and the Wrestler who’s career you almost ended, there are numerous incidences where you’ve just been a complete jackass who hasn’t given a shit about anything but how it might help you, get ahead!
And sure things may have changed and you may be a different person now, but do we really move on that much from who we were? I don’t think so Fred and I don’t think you believe that either. I mean only just recently you’ve had both your children committed to a psych facility as I mentioned earlier on, all because they called you out… You've had your own sister sent to a remote factory for your business so she doesn’t get in your way again! You’re running and hiding from your mistakes and that’s the reason I want to beat you… The reason I need to beat you!
Too many times in your life, have you made a decision you knew was wrong, unhealthy or just downright stupid but you went with it anyway! Why? Is it because you believe yourself to be infallible, Fred? Do you think you’re immortal? Untouchable? Well I can tell you right now son, you’re none of those things… You’re every bit as human as the rest of us and you’re just as responsible for the mistakes you’ve made and will make. The only thing I expect of you, the only thing any of us expect of you… Is to hold your hands up and own those mistakes!”
I stand, looking at the line of judges, then over at that guy, scowling back at me. I move towards the mirror and he matches my every stride on his own approach.
“I’ve been after you my entire life. You’ve been my Achilles heel this entire time… You’ve been that burning effigy in my mind from as far back as I can remember. You’ve plagued my dreams and haunted my daydreams! I’ve yet to find a way to stop you… But I’m not far from it, I can tell. The landscape isn’t the same as it used to be and every moment I spend in the ring now I sense the shift…
Even my dreams feel different and that’s all because I’m figuring it out, Fred… I’m figuring YOU out. From the days of your need for the thrill that got your brother killed, to the time you got your own father arrested and a bounty on your head along with him… All those times you put people in danger, including your own ex wife who left you because your children were just way too damaged and dangerous because of the life you lived!
The life I lived…
You see, this is the reason it has slowly gotten easier to defeat you, man… Because you’re me and I am you. We are one and the same not just figuratively or metaphorically! I - am - you. I have had to live with the consequences of every action I took and decision I made from that very first time at fourteen years old and I’ve had to not care about it, I’ve had to compartmentalize and carry on! I am that man!”
I turn away from the mirror and once again face those scrutinising me, behind the sea of spotlights.
“I am the man who couldn’t care less about what his opponent says or thinks, I couldn’t give a shit about what I do, so long as I have something to show for it at the end of the day! I don’t care who I face in day to day life, or inside the ring and the reason for that is because it is just a business acquisition for me… Nothing is ever personal although I take great pride in watching those who’ve wronged me suffer and everything they’ve built burned to the ground!
Yes I am the very man I want to fight, the very man I seek to destroy… But I am not here to change the way I do things, I’m just here to recognise it more! I’m here to own up to what I do… And have fun doing it! There’s only one way to fight this man and end it once and for all…”
I pick up the barstool and throw it straight at the mirror which smashes into a hundred pieces onto the floor. I mouth an apology to the Janitor.
“And this is it…
… Thank you.”
FADE TO BLACK.
“Who do I want to fight? I think the better question is, who don’t I want to fight? There’s a long line of names just ready to be reeled off like a graduation list. But, you know how some people may say Hitler, R. Kelly or Little Finger from Game of Thrones? Well, those aren’t the people I would choose. No, the person I would choose to fight, given the chance, is this guy…”
I signal for the Janitor to come onto the stage. He does so, pushing something that is covered with cloth. He slowly pulls off the cloth and retreats back into the wings, as his uncovering reveals a mirror… A mirror that is focused on me and me alone, we (my reflection and I) point at one another…
“Frederick Stephen Debonair. This is a forty year old man, formally happily married with two psychotic children currently sectioned at a Psych Unit in Los Angeles… Why do I want to fight him? Why do I want to choke this man out, leaving him laying on his own living room floor fighting for air? Well you see that part is quite difficult to explain but it’ll probably help if I start at the beginning. You see some of the choices this man has made in his lifetime are questionable and some are extremely questionable, I don’t think there’s ever one choice made by the guy that’s been the right one.
Take for example when he was fourteen, Fred Debonair had been at a party which to begin with he shouldn’t have been at, his mother had warned him and had only relented on him going out because he assured her he was staying over at a friend's house… That night, Fred took Xanax and Oxy and wound up in the local hospital almost dying and had to have his stomach pumped. This idiot already almost wrecked his entire life for the sake of “doing something cool” with his friends…
Not even two years later this dumb son of a bitch tried to convince me and his own brother it would be a very good idea to start insulting and piss off, some very hardened individuals on motorcycles outside of a club, in Reno… That very same night, Pacey Debonair, brother of Fred was killed by a very deranged individual who belonged to this same group of bikers… Yes you heard me correctly, Fred’s actions had cost his brother his life!”
I shuffle slightly uncomfortably on the bar stool as I close my eyes, memories flooding back.
“You see, everybody thinks this guy is some lovable rogue! A misunderstood individual but no, no he isn’t. Fred Debonair grew up with one thing on his mind, himself and everything he ever did was for his own benefit and gain… At the top of this whole thing I said that he had never made a decision that turned out to be correct for him, I was lying. At sixteen, just after the death of his brother he took to Wrestling… But even then, everything was about him.
He had been pulled into a match, after being in a promotion and training for less than a month because one of the original participants didn’t show. His opponent was a little wary of this young, inexperienced “Wrestler” going head to head with him but the promoter just saw dollar signs and so the match was booked. Now Fred could have looked at this as an opportunity to speak his mind and tell the promoter he wasn’t ready, but he didn’t. He wanted to make a name for himself and in doing so he delivered moved to his opponent so inaccurately several times, the man ended up in a coma…”
I turn my attention to my reflection, I point again… Pent up anger is flowing upwards inside my gut.
“It’s always you, you, you, isn't it Fred?! You never engage that damn brain of yours and I know what you’re going to say man… Better to ask forgiveness than permission right?? But it doesn’t always work that way and you know why. As well as Pacey and the Wrestler who’s career you almost ended, there are numerous incidences where you’ve just been a complete jackass who hasn’t given a shit about anything but how it might help you, get ahead!
And sure things may have changed and you may be a different person now, but do we really move on that much from who we were? I don’t think so Fred and I don’t think you believe that either. I mean only just recently you’ve had both your children committed to a psych facility as I mentioned earlier on, all because they called you out… You've had your own sister sent to a remote factory for your business so she doesn’t get in your way again! You’re running and hiding from your mistakes and that’s the reason I want to beat you… The reason I need to beat you!
Too many times in your life, have you made a decision you knew was wrong, unhealthy or just downright stupid but you went with it anyway! Why? Is it because you believe yourself to be infallible, Fred? Do you think you’re immortal? Untouchable? Well I can tell you right now son, you’re none of those things… You’re every bit as human as the rest of us and you’re just as responsible for the mistakes you’ve made and will make. The only thing I expect of you, the only thing any of us expect of you… Is to hold your hands up and own those mistakes!”
I stand, looking at the line of judges, then over at that guy, scowling back at me. I move towards the mirror and he matches my every stride on his own approach.
“I’ve been after you my entire life. You’ve been my Achilles heel this entire time… You’ve been that burning effigy in my mind from as far back as I can remember. You’ve plagued my dreams and haunted my daydreams! I’ve yet to find a way to stop you… But I’m not far from it, I can tell. The landscape isn’t the same as it used to be and every moment I spend in the ring now I sense the shift…
Even my dreams feel different and that’s all because I’m figuring it out, Fred… I’m figuring YOU out. From the days of your need for the thrill that got your brother killed, to the time you got your own father arrested and a bounty on your head along with him… All those times you put people in danger, including your own ex wife who left you because your children were just way too damaged and dangerous because of the life you lived!
The life I lived…
You see, this is the reason it has slowly gotten easier to defeat you, man… Because you’re me and I am you. We are one and the same not just figuratively or metaphorically! I - am - you. I have had to live with the consequences of every action I took and decision I made from that very first time at fourteen years old and I’ve had to not care about it, I’ve had to compartmentalize and carry on! I am that man!”
I turn away from the mirror and once again face those scrutinising me, behind the sea of spotlights.
“I am the man who couldn’t care less about what his opponent says or thinks, I couldn’t give a shit about what I do, so long as I have something to show for it at the end of the day! I don’t care who I face in day to day life, or inside the ring and the reason for that is because it is just a business acquisition for me… Nothing is ever personal although I take great pride in watching those who’ve wronged me suffer and everything they’ve built burned to the ground!
Yes I am the very man I want to fight, the very man I seek to destroy… But I am not here to change the way I do things, I’m just here to recognise it more! I’m here to own up to what I do… And have fun doing it! There’s only one way to fight this man and end it once and for all…”
I pick up the barstool and throw it straight at the mirror which smashes into a hundred pieces onto the floor. I mouth an apology to the Janitor.
“And this is it…
… Thank you.”
FADE TO BLACK.